Backwards Looking

      Anybody who knows anything about adoption knows that Gotcha day is one of the most important days in the life of an adoptee and their family. It's the day that an adopted son or daughter comes to be a part of a family. Each subsequent year, the day is celebrated as a reminder of the beginning of a new life. Recently, the day marked our son's first year home.  It turned out to be much more important than Jack's birthday. It marked a changed life, the kind of life that each child deserves, the kind of life that is full of possibilities, the kind of life that entitles him to the benefits of being a Paxton. Some of those benefits: being rocked to sleep, being hugged, being kissed, being sang to, hearing  I love you, never being alone, having someone to kiss your boo boos, and being able to say, That's MY Mommy and Daddy. It is a simplest of lists with life changing implications.
      I started doing some backwards looking around the time of Jack's Gotcha Day.  In one year, his health has improved. His skin has cleared. He can speak English. He has settled in and become more confident and secure.  The idea of backwards looking occurred to me as I watched him take the stairs to Sunday School a few weeks ago, one foot per step without holding on to the rail.  A year ago, the scenario would have been vastly different. Two weeks ago, was Jack still a little wobbly? Did I want to stay close behind him to catch him if he fell? Absolutely. I had to stop and remind myself to look backwards at the progress he has made. He is no longer the frightened, clumsy, and confused kid that we knew a year ago. I had to say out loud, " Sometimes,  you have to look backwards to see how far you have come."
      It seems to me that this is a lesson all of us could be reminded of from time to time, this thing of backwards looking. How easily am I discouraged when I stumble and fall while traveling along my Christian journey?  Each of us have those things that make us stumble and fall. All as unique as the individual they oppress.  I catch myself  thinking these sorts of thoughts. Are you kidding me? Am I really right back here again?  I thought I had gotten past this.  Why am I so weak?  When will I ever stop letting this trip me up? Sound familiar? Ladies, we all know the feelings of failure that can quickly creep up on us when we least expect it.
      One of my favorite Bible verses is Hebrews 12:1.  Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud a witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin that doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. I love to envision those who have gone before us, surrounding us, cheering us on.  Who better for such a job?  Paul tells us that this life is a race. Here, he is speaking of Greek races. The Greek Olympics were in full swing during Paul's lifetime. Those who read his letter would have known exactly what Paul was speaking of. Olympia terminology was commonplace throughout Paul's known world. The Greek word for race in this particular verse is ajgwvn.  It means a conflict, fight, contention, race. In other words, it is not a quick easy sprint. It is a marathon, a fight that takes great focus to win.  Paul makes it clear that this life will always have its ups and downs. The path can be, will be, difficult. We will fall, on occasion.
        We've established that the Christian race is not a cake walk. So, what happens when we trip over a hurdle and fall flat on our faces? Mind you, there are usually some spectators there to watch you crash and burn in your embarrassment. Sister....that's never a good day.  Backwards looking helps us to dust off the road rash and go for the next hurdle.  What has Christ delivered you from? Maybe, it is an addiction, lying, self hate, spiritual poverty, loneliness.  We all have a story. As Bob Jones stated, We don't get to choose the race that is placed in front of us. Sometimes, the hurdles are there before we ever arrive at the stadium. But, praise be to God, He is sanctifying us daily. Ladies, look at how far Christ has brought you! Best of all, we never have to go back to the start of the race, and the end is in sight. We have a prize that no one can take away from us,....no one. We are more than conquerors! Today, let's dust off our knees, do some backwards looking, and remember that Christ is our Deliverer.....Girls, I'll see ya at the races!